An Ordinary Person, An Extraordinary God: Gladys Aylward

With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.

Matthew 19:26

Gladys Aylward was born in 1902 into a working class English family.  As was common for a person of her class during that time, she went to work as a domestic servant at a young age. While in her early twenties, she attended a revival in which the preacher encouraged those attending to dedicate their lives to the service of God.  Gladys eagerly responded to call, feeling that the Lord was leading her to become a missionary to China.

Certain of her calling, Gladys became a probationer at the China Inland Missions Center in London, but her lack of education and poor academic abilities resulted in her failing in her exams there and she was rejected as a missionary candidate.  Despite this monumental setback, Gladys did not give up. She went back to work, saved her money, and continued to look for an opportunity to serve God.

In time, Gladys heard of an older missionary woman in China who was looking for a younger person to take over her work. The 73-year old woman, Jeannie Lawson, responded positively to Gladys' inquiry, offering her a job in China if Gladys could pay for her own passage there. Even with all that she had managed to set aside from her years of working as a maid, Gladys still did not have enough for ship passage to China.  However, she did have just enough for train passage and so, in 1930, Gladys set off from London with her passport, Bible, and just a little over two pounds (roughly equivalent to $100 dollars in today's economy).

It is hard to imagine a single woman, with no language training and few contacts, leaving on such an arduous journey to work in a strange land alongside a complete stranger, but this just indicated the faith that Gladys had in her extraordinary God. During her years of ministry, Gladys was instrumental in ending the centuries-old custom of foot binding (which  painfully crippled Chinese women by deforming their feet), in single-handedly stopped a prison riot, and in saving the lives of hundreds of unwanted girl babies. She became a shining beacon of Christianity to the people of China and earned herself the nickname, Ai-weh-deh, meaning "Virtuous One."

From this amazing life of Gladys Aylward, we can see the awesome results of an extraordinary God on an ordinary life.  Even though the people around her could not see the potential in Gladys, God saw her dedication, faith, and willingness to serve.  That was all that He needed to accomplish great things among the people of China.

Sometimes it's easy for us to fall back on the excuse that we are nobody special or that we have no special gifts that make us valuable in the service of the Lord.  However, Gladys Aylward did not let that stand in her way, no matter what others believed.  Her life should be an encouragement to all of us who feel that we are too ordinary to do extraordinary things for God.

Missions: Testing Your Mettle

Set your affections on things above; not on the things on the earth.

Colossians 3:2

Part Three: Bend or Break

Every veteran missionary will tell you that the key to surviving missions work is flexibility.  When you commit yourself to missions (whether career or short-term), God often chooses to take you in a direction that you never expected.  A willingness to defer to His plans, rather than yours, can make all the difference in the world.

For example, last year my husband, Alan, was invited to lead a week-long evangelistic crusade in Belarus.  During the week, we would immerse ourselves in the community; inviting everyone we met to attend the crusade.  At night, Alan would preach and I would serve as a counselor for women who came down to receive Christ.  We purchased our airline tickets and renewed our passports (which would be expiring in a few months).

Since Belarus requires a visa, we prepared our paperwork and, about a month before we were due to leave, we sent our passports and documents to the Belarus embassy in Washington, DC.  When two weeks passed without word, Alan called the embassy to get an update.  He was told that our passports and paperwork had been mailed back the day before because the necessary documents from our Belarusian contact had not arrived!

Alan called the Belarusian pastor who had issued the invitation and he told us that there had been a delay at his end and that the paperwork was on its way to the Belarus embassy.  We were to overnight our passports and documents as soon as we received them.  The next day, the materials were returned to us and we immediately sent them back.  They would arrive at the embassy sometime on Friday- a mere 11 days before our flight.

Since the embassy was closed on weekends, we called first thing on Monday morning, only to find out that it was closed because of a Belarusian holiday.  By Tuesday morning, our anxiety level was starting to spike.  We began calling as soon as they opened.  We were shocked to be told that they had not received our materials.

Another frantic call (this time to the postal service), revealed that major power outages in Washington DC (due to deadly storms in the area) had caused significant problems in mail delivery.  According to their records, we were told, the package had been delivered.  Fortunately, God placed a wonderful postal worker at the other end of the phone line.  He promised to personally find out what had happened to the package and get back to us.

In the meantime, Alan and I looked at our options.  Even if the package was located and delivered to the Belarus embassy the next day, we had been told that there was not enough time to process the visa and get it to us before our flight. It seemed evident that our trip to Belarus was not going to happen.  Our flight was non-refundable and, being of Scottish descent, I couldn't stand the idea of letting all that money go to waste.  The one silver lining in all this dark cloud was that (to save money) we had not chosen a direct flight to Belarus, but found a deal that required a stopover in Warsaw, Poland. A quick search on the internet showed that a visa was not required in order to visit Poland. 

"Looks like we're doing a mission trip to Poland," I said.

"If our passports get back in time," Alan reminded me. "Besides, what are we gonna do when we get there?"

"If nothing else, we'll stand on a street corner and tell people about Jesus or prayer walk through the communities."

"Sounds like a plan!"

On the off chance that we might find a ministry to plug into, Alan contacted the International Mission Board and relayed the our dilemma to them; asking if he could contact missionaries in Warsaw and find out if there was anything we could do to assist them.  They promised to pass our information along and, hopefully, a missionary would contact us.

On Thursday, the man from the postal service called to say that our package had been located.  It had been placed in one of the two mail bins belonging to the embassy.  The embassy worker who came to pick up the mail had only taken one of the bins.  Our packet was still in the bin at the post office. What did we want done with it?  Our reply was prompt and decisive: Send it back.

We began researching Poland and trying to decide what to pack, since we had no idea what we might be doing there. On Monday, we gave a sigh of relief to find our passports in the mailbox.  We were definitely going to Poland. On Tuesday morning, we headed to the Atlanta airport, with no idea what we were going to do, but determined to find some way to serve.

Thirty minutes before boarding, Alan's cell phone rang.  It was a missionary from Poland calling.  He had gotten our message. He was on the coast of Poland leading a camp for families interested in practicing their English skills with native English speakers.  The topics included were issues that fostered discussion about faith and beliefs, allowing the leaders to share their faith with the group.  While the adults were in their groups, the children attended a VBS-style camp at the site. 

The missionary was surprised at the timing of our message because one of the American couples who were volunteering for the camp had just received word of a death in the family and were having to fly back.  Did Alan feel comfortable stepping in as a discussion leader and would I be willing to work with the children?

By the time we boarded the plane, most of the details had been settled.  God had closed the door on our work in Belarus, but He opened up another wonderful window of opportunity for us in Poland.  A chance to minister that might have been missed if we had not been flexible.

Admittedly, this was an extreme example of how plans can go awry on a mission trip.  However, if you see that God can work through what seems to be a catastrophe, you can be sure that He can help overcome the other problems that often arise on mission trips.  If your luggage goes astray, God can provide clothes to wear- even if they aren't your first choice in fashion.  If a flight is delayed, look around to see who God wants you to witness to at the airport. 

There is nothing like a mission trip to test your mettle and to help you to see how strong your faith really is.  When difficulties come, will you bend or will you break?

A Veteran Missionary's Guide to Missions

And He said unto them, Go ye into all the world,
 and preach my Gospel to every creature.

Mark 16:15

Part One: Why We Must Do Missions

Evangelism is a focal part of the Christian faith.  Sharing our faith with the lost is something that Christ expects from each of his followers. It is not a suggestion or a request; it is a mandate from God. Evangelism is the natural by-product of a mature and growing faith.  For the majority of Christians, evangelism takes place on the local level.  We witness to our family members, neighbors, co-workers, and (sometimes) even complete strangers. 

A part of evangelism is missions.  The word "missions" was coined by Jesuit monks to describe those who were "sent" to minister in foreign lands. They rightly believed that this special calling, with its greater dangers and sacrifices, was set apart from regular evangelism and deserved (at the least) a new classification.  Unlike many Christians today, who believe that "we are all missionaries," the early Church understood that leaving your family, your culture, and your heart language behind so that you could pour out your life in a strange land was not the same as spending twenty minutes telling your neighbor what Christ has done in your life.

During the early era of international missions, the crate that carried your possessions to the field often doubled as your coffin.  The average life expectancy for those early missionaries was less than five years. Fortunately, medical breakthroughs and advances in transportation has significantly improved the survival rate of missionaries.   However, the sacrifices they make are still very real.  Ask anyone who has spent more than a month overseas; it is not easy to live in a different country.

Obviously, Christians do not do missions because it is easy.  They do it because it is right.  The Great Commission was not limited to local evangelism.  Jesus commanded them to go "unto the uttermost part of the earth."  To me, that phrase always conjured up images of those places that I would LEAST like to visit- and that may very well be what He was saying.  Missions requires us to reach a greater level of commitment in our service to Christ because we often end up going to places that we never wanted to go to and doing things that are completely outside our comfort zone.

So, you may be asking yourself, "What is she trying to do, scare me from ever doing a mission trip?" No, that isn't my intent at all.  Instead, what I'm trying to say is that the missions experience will take your faith to a higher level because it is HARD.  Have you ever talked to someone who has just returned from a mission trip?   They go on and on and on about how incredible it was and how it changed their life.  The number one response that I've heard from first-time mission trippers is something like this: "I went, thinking that I might be a blessing to others, but I ended up being the one who was blessed."

Going on a mission trip is a lot like riding a roller coaster for the first time.  There is a lot of anxiety and trepidation before you head out, then you are overwhelmed with new sensations and experiences, and finally you are dropped back at the start feeling exhilarated and you can hardly wait to do it again. Face it, missions gives you a rush like nothing else, but (like the roller coaster) it can be a bumpy ride; whether it is your first mission trip or your fiftieth, you just never know what might happen.

Over the next few weeks, I'm going to be writing on what you can do to make your next mission trip a little easier.  If you've never gone on a mission trip, I hope that these blogs will spark a desire in you to stretch your faith enough to be willing to reach the lost overseas.  At the very least, I hope that it will give you the knowledge of how you can better pray for those in your church who will soon be taking mission trips and for the career missionaries who have committed their whole lives to reaching the uttermost ends of the earth.

A Mother on Father's Day

Behold what manner of love the Father hath bestowed on us...

I John 3:1

Father's Day is kinda fun for moms.  We're off the hook as a topic for the sermon, while our husbands get to be in the hot seat (as we were for Mother's Day) and we get to apply our elbow to our spouse's ribs at appropriate times to make sure that they are listening to the pastor on certain points that we've mentioned (okay, maybe nagged a little about) for most of the year. But for the most part, we just take a back seat and try to make sure that our hubbies have a special day.

However, as women, Father's Day is really more of a big deal than we may realize.  After all, this day also reminds us of our own fathers and the impact (for good or evil) that they had on our lives.  In fact, many psychologists believe that there is no greater influence on a young girl's emotional development than the father.  Studies show that the daughters of absent or indifferent fathers frequently turn out to be promiscuous, seeking attention outside the home that they never received from their dads.

Having grown up watching ideal fathers on shows like "Father Knows Best," "Leave It To Beaver," and "Little House on the Prairie," many of us realized pretty quickly that our own dads fell short of the mark. Real life can't compete with fiction, where dads never seem to have bad days or short tempers.  Fathers, being human, make mistakes- some bigger than others.  Most of us have, at one time or another, felt rejected, unloved, or hurt by our fathers. 

But Father's Day shouldn't be a time when we wallow in self pity because our childhood was less than perfect.  Instead, it should be a celebration! Because no matter what our earthly father was like, as Christians we have a perfect heavenly Father.  Not only does God love us just the way we are, but He created us just as we are and (like everything in His creation) He saw that it was good. So no matter how unloved and lonely we may sometimes feel, we can be assured that our Father loves us with an everlasting love and He will never, ever leave us.

Father's Day never fails to remind me that my heavenly Father loves me so much that He gave His only Son for me. So despite the fact that Mother's Day is supposed to be my own special day, I have to admit that Father's Day is pretty awesome, too.

Rising Above Fear

For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee,
 Fear not; I will help thee.

Isaiah 41:13

We just got back from a family trip to the beach. The first day we arrived, we hurried to change into swimsuits and dashed for the beach.  Within minutes, we were all in the water: all except one.
Our youngest granddaughter, who is timid in nature, was afraid of the waves.  She didn't know what might happen to her if she went in the water. We didn't push, but let her skip around on the edge of the waves, watching the other kids frolicking in the water.  Finally, she decided to try getting in, but only if Daddy held her hand.

Within a few minutes, she was jumping and splashing in the water along with the others. Her father's big, strong hand had helped her to find the courage to overcome her fear.  By the end of the week, she was laughing at the idea that she had ever been afraid of the water.

Did you know that the phrase "fear not" is found 62 times in the Bible? It's not surprising that God spent so much time on this topic.  Most Christian women will admit that they struggle with fear on a regular basis. However, for many of us, fear can take root in our hearts and grow; throwing a giant shadow across our lives until it almost paralyzes us.

What we sometimes forget is that fear is not something that Satan throws at us; it is something that we create from our own imaginations.  After all, if you think about it you will realize that we aren't fearful about what is actually happening, we are afraid of what might happen in the future. For example, you may hear on the news that unemployment is again on the rise and that makes you fearful.  However, what you are fearing is not the unemployment rate but the possibility that you or your husband might lose your job.  It isn't the present problem that produces fear, but the potential for future suffering.

God doesn't want us to live in fear because fear robs us of our joy.  This week, I learned an important lesson from my granddaughter.  We don't know what might happen to us when we walk out that front door.  The world is a scary place and bad things do happen.  However, I can choose to focus on what is going on in my life today, knowing that God is right there, holding my hand; or I can dwell on the bad things that could happen to me or my loved ones someday, and live in fear.  Ultimately, like any sin, it is a choice that I make every day.

Today, I choose to take God's hand.

Milk, Meat, or Meringue?

For every one that useth milk is unskillful in the word of righteousness; for he is a babe.  But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil.

Hebrews 5: 13-14

My husband and I made a New Year's resolution to eat healthier.  We've cut back on the sweets and included more vegetables into our diet.  It hasn't been easy and sometimes we've overindulged in the sweet stuff.  Nevertheless, we've stuck with it because we understand that to have a healthy, strong body, we need to consume the right things.

It's the same for our soul; it needs to be fed the right kind of food. When we were young in the Lord, we needed milk because we were not mature enough to handle solids.  However, we cannot stay on the bottle our whole life. Can you imagine a teenager walking around with a baby bottle? As we grow, the needs of our body changes.  We need meat to develop.  There comes a time when staying on the bottle will stunt our growth and make us malnourished.

As our bodies develop and change, so do our nutritional needs.  There are stages in our life when we need more protein, others when we need more calcium, and, face it, sometimes we just need a little comfort food.  Yet, we still need to maintain a balanced diet at all times. The same is true spiritually.  There are stages in our Christian walk when we need the strong doctrine of Romans; other times when we need to focus on the foundations of Genesis; and sometimes when we just need the comfort of Psalms. Through those stages, we need to maintain a balance of all the Scriptures, both Old and New Testament.

As my husband and I continue our quest to eat healthier, we still enjoy a sugary treat on occasion. When taken in moderation, sweets can help brighten the day and make you feel good.  Sometimes, we need a little something sweet and light in our Christian walk; what I call spiritual meringue.  There are lots of Christian books out there that are chocked full of spiritual meringue.  They make you feel good about yourself, and who doesn't need that now and then? Sometimes pastors may serve up a meringue sermon to encourage and uplift his flock.

But there is a great danger if we fail to moderate the amount of meringue in our Christian life.  After all, despite how sweet it tastes and how good it makes us feel, we need to remember that it is all fluff and no substance.  A diet that consists primarily of meringue will make us weak and eventually kill us. That is why we need to focus on the meat in our personal devotions- and make sure that our church is serving up a steady dose of the solid stuff.

The world tells us that "you are what you eat."  In a way, this passage in Hebrews is telling us the same thing.  If we are still on a diet of watered-down Scriptures, then we are trying to remain as spiritual babies.  And, babies can't do a lot to further the Kingdom of Heaven.  However, if we are consuming the meat of God's Word on a regular basis, then we are mature Christians who are spiritually fit to do God's work.

One of the first steps we had to take in eating right was to keep a daily journal of what we consume.  Most people are not aware of what they are consuming each day.  By writing it down, it makes us realize exactly what we are eating and how much of it.  What would we learn about our spiritual diet if we did this?  Are we having a steady diet of the meat of God's Word or do we snack endlessly on the latest Christian bestseller? Do we have regular meals or go for days without eating at all?

God has already laid the table for us.  With 66 incredible books to choose from, we have an endless choice of entrees.  So sidle up to the table and make sure you clean your plate. Bon appetit!

Willingly Ignorant

For this they willingly are ignorant of, that by the Word of God the heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water: whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished.

II Peter 3:5 - 6

This week I attended an Answers in Genesis conference with my grandkids. It was a special event for me because I remembered attending this same conference with my children when they were about the same age. What really made the occasion special was knowing that my daughter is providing the Biblical foundation that my grandchildren need to combat the philosophies of this world. Like Ken Ham, I believe that the battle for the minds and beliefs of our children begins with Genesis.

When I started college, I had only been a Christian for a year.  When we began to study evolution in my biology class, I quickly realized that there was a gigantic chasm between what the Bible teaches about our origins and what our science classes teach.  For me, there was no spiritual conflict over this issue.  I believed that God's Word was literal and inerrant; therefore, there had to be error in what my teacher was telling me.

Over the next few years, I read every book (Christian and secular) that I could on the topic of evolution- even Darwin's Origin of the Species. The more that I read, the more certain I became that evolution was fiction.  I learned that evolutionists frequently put forth their own assumptions and assertions as "facts" even when their is little or no actual data to support their theories.  For example, a tooth or a portion of a skull is "reconstructed" into a new "species" of early man. 

Now, decades later (with a Master's degree in Archaeology) I know that what passes for science today is 10% facts and 90% supposition.  Whether its evolutionary biology, theoretical physics, or geology, what we actually know for sure is just a drop in the bucket compared to what we do not know.  If you think that I am exaggerating, ask yourself why our science books have to be updated every 5 to 10 years.  It isn't because we are adding that much new knowledge, but that we are changing our suppositions regarding those few facts that we know.

God's Word is different. It is immutable and inerrant. It doesn't have to be updated or revised because it is infallible.  In all my years of researching the origin of man, I have never found one single fact that calls into question the credibility and accuracy of the Scriptures.  The scientific evidence of a young earth, created in six days, is overwhelming.

However, my faith isn't built upon the science of creationism.  My faith is founded in the Word of God.  Ultimately that is where we all stand or fall as Christians.  Do we put our faith in the word of man or do we put our faith in the Word of God? That is the foundational choice that determines the course of our own personal walk.  We can choose to try to avoid making the choice or we can try to waffle on the decision by trying to put together some hybrid mix of faith and science; but by doing that we are actually choosing to mitigate the truth of God's Word.

Walking by faith cannot be a half-hearted action.  If we are not 100% certain of the reliability of God's Word, then Satan will slowly and surely chip away at us until our faith collapses like a house of cards. If you haven't given this issue much thought, maybe it is time that you did.  If you've been on the fence about creationism, trying to live with one foot in the world and the other with God, then maybe its time that you asked yourself this question: How is that working for you?

Reflections on Mother's Day

I love Mother's Day.  After all, being a mother is usually a pretty thankless job.  Kids seldom notice the sacrifices that you make for them when they are young, so it is nice that for one day out of the year you get to be gushed over. What's not to like about that?!

For me, it is also the day to remind myself that the children that I had birthed do not really belong to me.  God had allowed me the privilege of caring for them, but in reality, they belonged to God.  It's what I call Stewardship Parenting.  As Christians, we tend to be aware (at least in theory) that our money, belongings, and time actually belong to God and that we are just the stewards of those things.  God allows us to use six days a week to do the things that we need (and want) to do, but reserves one day a week for Himself.  He allows us to spend 90% of our money on ourselves, but expects the tithe to go toward His work.

However, we often forget that the same holds true for our children.  We make the mistake of thinking that they are ours- and that gives us the wrong approach in child rearing. We focus on what we want for our kids (happiness, success, security) rather than what God wants.  The reality is that the Christian walk requires sacrifice and suffering.  As parents, we often do all we can to shield our children from those things; forgetting that those experiences are the things that build faith, character, and integrity. 

Our natural instinct as a mother is to protect our children.  However, we are (in essence) tying God's hands when we rush in to protect our kids from the consequences of poor choices. It is vital that children learn the principle of sowing and reaping by experiencing it first hand.  We are opposing God when we try to mitigate the consequences of sin in our childrens' lives.  If we saw a loving parent trying to discipline their child, we would never rush in and try to stop them; but when we shield our children from God's discipline, we are doing just that.

It isn't easy to practice Stewardship Parenting.  It means that we have to truly give our children up to God.  It wasn't easy for Abraham to offer Isaac up as a sacrifice and it isn't any easier for us today.  Giving our children back to God may mean that they end up on the other side of the world doing mission work or live in semi-poverty to minister to native Americans in South Dakota.  While we may feel compelled to transfer our own hopes and ambitions on to our children, Stewardship Parenting means that we enable our children to pursue the course that God has laid out for their lives- even if it means laying down their lives for the Gospel.

Looking back on all the wonderful Mother's Days that I've had, it's great to be honored as a mother; but it's even better to set aside my own selfish desires and expectations of motherhood so that I can be the kind of mother that God wants me to be.  After all, that is what a great mother really is.

What Will Tomorrow Bring?

Do not boast about tomorrow; for you do not know what a day may bring forth.

Proverbs 27:1

Have you ever noticed how a day seldom turns out the way that we think it will?  We wake up, expecting the day to go a certain way, but unforeseen circumstances and events propel us on a course that we could not have seen.  A day that we think will be the most important of our lives turn out to be a let down; while another seemingly unimportant day turns out to be the best (or the worst) day of our lives.

This holds true for the course of our lives, as well.  As Christians, we often start on a path toward a goal, only to find the road blocked so that we are forced to take another way.  Paul experienced this when he decided to take the Gospel into Asia (Acts 15). Paul's motives and desires were pure, but God prevented him from going. It must have been both puzzling and frustrating for Paul to see his dream of reaching Asia Minor die. Unfortunately for Paul, he didn't have our benefit of seeing the situation from the future.  When God blocked Paul from going into Asia, he moved him toward Philippi, the gateway to the Roman Empire.  In effect, God was taking the Gospel into Europe, where it had the greatest potential of spreading throughout the world.

No human could have anticipated that Europe would one day be the center of civilization- and that its influence would eventually spread across the Atlantic Ocean to a New World; but God knew. While Paul had his own personal ambitions and dreams, he had the faith to set aside his desires in obedience to God's direction.  Because of Paul's obedience (and the faith and obedience of others like him), I live in a nation that was founded on Biblical principles.

Lately, I've felt a little like Paul.  Alan and I moved to Clermont (a small town in northeast Georgia) thirteen years ago, thinking that this would be the place where we would set down roots and live until we retired.  We built our dream house and invested our lives in this wonderful community. But God had other plans.  Slowly, He has clipped away at the roots that we set down; gently, but firmly, uprooting us and leading us into a new work in a new area.

This month, the last of those roots were severed.  Our dream house is sold and our belongings are being packed away into cardboard boxes.  It is a painful process, as I'm sure it must have been for Paul, but the sorrow is balanced with a hopeful anticipation of how God will be using us as we begin down this new path in our life.  After forty years of serving the Lord, we have learned (like Paul) that despite the occasional shipwrecks and stonings that we endure in our lives, God never fails us.  He has a purpose for our lives and, though we cannot see what is at the end of this path, God can- and it is sure to be awesome.

Loving Your Neighbor

And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.

Luke 10:27

 

 

Jesus repeatedly emphasized the importance of these two principles: love God and love your neighbor. In the Gospel of Luke, a lawyer raises the question of who our neighbor is; to which Jesus responded with the well-known parable of the Good Samaritan.  Through that parable, Christ effectively tore down the racial barriers that threatened to keep the Christian faith limited to the Jews and empowered the spread of the Gospel to all people.

 

What I've noticed, however, is that while we eagerly accept the worldwide definition of "neighbor," we tend to overlook the literal aspect of loving our neighbor. Are we loving the very people that live next door to us?  Think of your neighborhood as your own personal mission field.  You are the missionary that God has sent to the families that live in your subdivision.

 

As former international missionaries, we quickly learned the "golden rule" of evangelism: "People won't accept what you say until they believe that you love them."  This concept holds true all over the world- and especially in your neighborhood.  Your witness need to begin by building genuine relationships with your neighbors.

 

In order to love our neighbor, we need to begin with being a good neighbor. Did you know that the number one cause of conflict between neighbors are pets?  Dogs that are prone to barking or that are allowed outside unsupervised are a major source of annoyance to neighbors and can destroy any chance of a Christian witness.

Deuteronomy 19:14 commands us not to encroach on our neighbor's land.  A good neighbor respects the property of his fellow neighbors.  You can avoid border wars by keeping your pets and children off of your neighbors' land and being careful not to place trees or structures too close to property lines.

Noisy neighbors are a problem to everyone living nearby; whether it is loud music, parties, or just running the leaf blower early on a Saturday morning.  If you are planning a party or barbecue, be polite and let the neighbors know ahead of time.  Keep kids and pets indoors (or at least quiet) until 10 AM on weekends and after 10 PM on weekdays.

Finally, go the extra mile in being a good neighbor.  Be friendly.  Take the time to speak to your neighbor if you see them out in the yard. If they seem open, begin building a relationship slowly, but follow the advice of Proverbs 15:17 and don't overdo it..  If conflicts have already arisen between you and a neighbor, try to resolve the problem and "mend fences."

Neighbors can be a wonderful resource in times of need. Proverbs 27:10 tells us that, in a calamity, a neighbor nearby is better than family that live farther away. Whether you need to borrow a cup of sugar to finish that recipe or someone to pick your daughter up at the bus stop while you run your sick baby to the doctor, a neighbor can be a life saver.  Neighbors who know you and are somewhat familiar with your schedule can be the best security system around.

After commanding us to love God with all our hearts, Jesus says that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves. He tells us that there is no greater commandments than these.  If loving our neighbor is that important to Jesus, it ought to be important to us, too.






Fearless Faith

And He said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? How is it that ye have no faith?

Mark 4:40

Just prior to going overseas to serve as missionaries with the International Mission Board, Alan and I  spoke at numerous churches across the southeast. Our five children, ranging in age from 5 to 12, went with us. At every church that we visited, I had the same conversation after the service.

"So, you are going to be a missionary in Southeast Asia?"

"That's right," I'd say with a smile.

"Are you taking your children?"

"Yes, we are."

"All of them?"

"Yes, all of them." (Did they really think I would only take some of my children with me?)

"I could never take my children to some foreign country! Aren't you afraid that something might happen to them?"

"God has called us to the mission field," I would explain. "If I've learned anything, it is that my family is safer in a foreign country if we are following God's Will, than we could ever be in America if we are outside of His Will."

Fear is a terrible thing.  It robs us of joy, corrupts our thinking, and paralyzes our ability to do what is right.  We cannot fight it with words because fear is irrational.  In Romans 8:15, Paul calls fear "a spirit of bondage."  It is a very appropriate term because fear truly makes us a prisoner. And like other sins (Yes, fear IS A SIN), it damages our spiritual growth and our willingness to serve the Lord.

For a woman, fear is the greatest weapon that Satan can use against us. I know, because there was a time when I allowed fear to get a stronghold in my life. But, praise the Lord, God has empowered us through the Holy Spirit to be able to break the chains of fear. We know this to be true, but sometimes it can be a little tricky to actually apply.

Let me share a few tips that helped me to overcome fear in my own life.  The first thing that I had to do was to stop watching the news on TV.  I sometimes think that the main purpose of the evening news is to instill as much fear into Americans as possible.  Just look at the headline news: murders, tragic fires, deadly crashes.  Why do we need to see those things? Is there anything that we can do about them? NO! Then why subject ourselves to them?  God gives us sufficient grace to handle the tragedies that happen in our own lives and the lives of those around us, but not to deal with the suffering of the whole world. So turn the television off and read your news (if you absolutely have to have it) from the internet.

The next time you are facing a fearful situation, ask yourself this: What is the worst thing that could happen?  For example, layoffs at work may be making you fearful about your own job.  So the worst thing that could happen is that you would lose your job.  So if you lost your job, what is the worst thing that could happen? You could lose your home and be forced to live in a homeless shelter.  If that happened, could any good come from it?  Well, yes, you could start a ministry to the homeless; without a job, you'd have more time with your children; and you wouldn't have to do housework. It all boils down to this: If the worse did happen, do you believe that God would be with you through it all?

It is not a coincidence that Jesus equates fear with a lack of faith.  If we truly believe that God can walk us through the valley of the shadow of death and bring us out into the sunshine on the other side, then fear cannot take root in our heart. We cannot argue ourselves out of being fearful. We have to build the kind of faith that can defeat it. That kind of faith requires stepping out and putting our lives on the line when He asks us to.  Running from God and His Will only produces unbelief.

So next time that Satan tries to enslave you with the chains of fear, trust that God can see you through the worst of storms. Take it from someone who has gone through some of those "worst things", GOD WILL BE THERE FOR YOU!

The Power of Prayer

If you ask anything in my name, I will do it.

John 14:14

My birthday was this week and I can never celebrate a birthday without remembering the birthday that God used to remind me of the power of prayer.  My husband and I had been serving as missionaries in Indonesia for a couple of years.  Our teenage daughters were involved in a youth group called International Christian Youth, which was made up of high school students from a dozen different countries.

After one of the weekly Bible studies, my husband came home and told me that he had been asked to be the speaker for their annual retreat and wanted me to be one of the counselors.  That was no problem for me, until I found out that the retreat fell on my birthday.  As much as I enjoyed working with youth, I have to admit that I wasn't overjoyed at the idea of spending my birthday with a hundred noisy teens. I finally agreed, grudgingly, to go.

Arriving at the retreat site, we quickly discovered that the facilities were more rustic than we had expected- and that's saying a lot when you have been living in a third world country for a few years!  Our room consisted of a set of rickety bunk beds and was crawling (quite literally) with insects and lizards.  The bathroom contained a squatty potty (basically a hole in the floor over which you squatted) and a sink equipped with cold water only.  Since the temperatures hit close to 100 degrees and there was no air conditioning, it seemed that the cold water would come in handy. I'd like to say that I didn't grumble about the living conditions, but that wouldn't be the truth.  I had a terrible attitude about the whole thing.  Fortunately, God can use us; even despite ourselves.  Just look at Jonah!

Many of the youth had brought along lost friends from the international school or their neighborhoods.  Despite my bad attitude, it was hard to resist the atmosphere of love among those youth and the earnest desire to see their friends come to Christ.  The final night of the retreat, my husband led an appeal for the lost to come forth and receive Jesus as their Savior.  We were overjoyed to see twelve teens come down and accept Christ.

I had to admit that the ride home was not terribly pleasant for me.  The Lord was really dealing with me about my attitude about the retreat and I had to get my own heart right with God.  I couldn't help but wonder at the fact that He had so blessed the retreat, despite me and my hard heart. My daughter helped me to put it into perspective.  She was looking through our recent copy of the International Missionary Board's prayer calendar.

"Look, Mom," she said, pointing out my name in the booklet. "The churches back home were praying for you on your birthday."

That was a real light bulb moment for me.  It wasn't my husband's deep Bible studies (though he is certainly a gifted speaker) nor me and my bad attitude that had brought those twelve souls to salvation.  It was the power of prayer. And though God had taught me the lesson of prayer's power before that day, I can never celebrate a birthday without being reminded of how our Wonderful, Loving God allows us to partner with Him in His ministry through the power of prayer.

Move Over, Rambo!

And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made He a woman,

and brought her unto the man.

Genesis 2:22

I was a young mother (with five children under the age of 8) when my husband asked a special favor of me.

"After the kids are in bed tonight," he said. "There is a Rambo marathon on television.  Would you watch a couple of the movies with me?"

Now I like action movies as well as anyone, but the Rambo movies had never particularly appealed to me. But since it meant so much to him, I said "yes."

I'll never forget one particular part of the movie. Rambo had been injured and was evidently in a lot of pain, but that didn't stop him. My husband turned to me, admiration in his eyes.

"Now that is a real man!" he told me. "He's bleeding and in pain, but he just grits his teeth and continues on with his mission."

I looked my husband squarely in the eye.

"That's no big deal," I replied. "Women do that every single month!"

There's no doubt about it, women can be as tough as nails, if the situation demands it. But like two sides of a coin, the other side of us is delicate and fragile. We are a true study in contrasts.  It's no wonder that men have such trouble understanding us.

The Bible describes us as the "weaker sex" and this is true in many ways. As a gender, we lack the
upper body strength of men. Our smaller lung capacity and lower red blood cell count causes us to have much less stamina than the opposite sex.  During World War II, factories were running around the clock to keep up with the needs of the military.  When work hours were raised from 8 to 10 hours a day, accidents among the women workers increased 150% while rates among men were unchanged.  It was determined that exhaustion was the number one cause of accidents in those cases. The long hours were just too much for the women.

That doesn't mean that we aren't pretty tough, in our own way.  Studies have shown that women can withstand extreme temperatures (both heat and cold) much better than men.  Despite Rambo's apparent insensity to pain, numerous studies show that women can tolerate much higher levels of pain. Recently, ABC news reported a study in which two men were hooked up to a machine that simulates the contractions of childbirth.  Though most labor lasts between 12 and 14 hours, these men lasted a mere two hours before pulling the plug.

However, few would debate the suggestion that women are more emotionally fragile than men.  And, despite what we would like to think, women have historically been more easily duped into believing false doctrine.  Eve was just the first of many to fall for Satan's lies. Women generally make up two-thirds of religious cults in America.

From the beginning of creation, we were created as a unique counterpart to man. Nowhere is this better exemplified than in the original Hebrew wording.  In Genesis 2, we read that God formed (yatsar) both man and beasts. The word is intrinsically connected to the concept of a potter and his clay.

But when God prepares to create the woman in verse 22, He builds (banah) her. The word is not used for any other part of the creation process.  It is unique to the woman.

The word is later applied when Abram built an altar to the Lord and to describe the building of Solomon's temple. It seems fitting that this Hebrew word came to be used to express the concept of building a family; the same expression that we use in English today.

From this we can see that God had a very different approach to the creation of woman.  We were, and still are, unique in His eyes.  It is that uniqueness that makes us the perfect complement to man- even when our differences drive them crazy!

Since God created us so differently, it shouldn't be a surprise that women are so different from men in so many ways.

Embracing the Differences

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him;

male and female created he them.

Genesis 1:27

 

 

"Honey, where's the peanut butter?" My husband yells from the kitchen.

 

"It's on the second shelf of the pantry," I tell him, as though that isn't where I have kept it for the last ten years.

 

"We must be out," he responds. "I'm looking on the second shelf and its not here."

 

"It is there," I say. "I just opened a new jar yesterday."

 

"Well, it's not here now!"

 

Finally, I put down my work and head to the kitchen.  My husband is standing at the pantry door, scanning the shelves.  Walking up, I point to the jar of peanut butter, which is prominently displayed on the second shelf.

 

"Oh," he says, sheepishly. "I didn't see it."

 

I'm far from being alone in this experience.  Nearly every wife has gone through this scenario at some time or another.  It used to be a source of aggravation to me, until I began to learn about how the male mind works and how totally different it is from the way a woman's mind works. This difference in how we think directly impacts the way that we communicate.

 

A recent study showed that men typically use only the left side of their brain when communicating. (No, that does not mean that they are not in their right mind most of the time!)  Women, on the other hand, usually use both sides of their brain when interacting with others.  The left side of the brain is predominantly analytical while the right side is predominantly creative. 

 

Because of this, there is a distinctive difference in the way that the two sexes think.  The easiest way to understand these differences is to picture men as linear thinkers (as in points along a straight line) and women as concentric thinkers (as in points within concentric circles).  It also means that, in any situation, a man, using the left-side of his brain, will want "just the facts, ma'am." While a woman will take those facts (left brain) and look at all the possible outcomes (right brain).

 

Let's just use the illustration above to show how this applies to daily life. The husband decides to make a sandwich and goes to the pantry for the peanut butter. His analytical mind pictures the jar of peanut butter and his eyes begin scanning for that image.  Now, if the jar differs in any way from the image that he has in his mind (i.e. different size, different color, different packaging, or partially obscured by the mayonnaise), he literally cannot identify it as peanut butter. 

 

Women, on the other hand, begin with that same approach, but they are able to use the creative, right-side of their brain to extrapolate changes to that original image. So even if the peanut butter has a new label or is barely peeping out from behind the mayonnaise, we can quickly locate and identify it.

 

The ability to use both sides of the brain makes women especially gifted in taking care of children.  If a child picks up a jagged piece of metal, we immediately see a number of possible dangers related to that piece of metal. If a boy climbs a tree, we understand the potential for him to get stuck and we understand the potential for him to fall out of the tree. In fact, in any situation, we may assess a dozen or more possible consequences for one single action.

 

The male mind approaches things very differently. He sees a boy climbing a tree and thinks of the goal- reaching the top.  Instead of considering possible negative consequences, he looks at the steps of action needed to reach the goal; put your foot on that branch, take hold of that limb.  Failure isn't something that he dwells on.

 

As a mother, we may get very annoyed at a husband's inability to recognize possible dangers, but for a man to think like us could be potentially devastating.  In a crisis situation, a man does not need his brain flooded with images of all the horrific things that could happen to him or it might paralyze him in a situation that requires him to defend himself, his family, or his country.

 

An example of this occurred on September 11, 2001 at the Twin Towers.  Despite the overwhelming potential for personal injury and death, 340 male firefighters laid down their lives by rushing into the doomed buildings to try to rescue those inside. Now, that doesn't mean that women don't perform acts of heroism, as well; just as they did on September 11th.  In extraordinary circumstances, both sexes have the potential for great acts of courage in the face of danger.

 

The point is that God has created us uniquely as male and female.  By understanding and embracing those differences, we can build stronger and more satisfying relationships with the opposite sex. Today we looked at one aspect of the way that we think.  Next week, I'll be explaining how the differences in linear and concentric thinking makes communication between the sexes a challenge. 

Breaking the Language Barrier

"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way..."   
 I Peter 3:7

On a recent mission trip, one of the ladies on the team was trying to communicate with our driver, who didn't understand a word of English. When the driver gave her a blank look and shook his head in confusion, the woman began the entire conversation again- only this time she said it louder, as though the increased volume would somehow break the language barrier. After several minutes of this, the woman and the driver finally gave up in frustration; the woman annoyed because the driver didn't understand her and the driver upset because he couldn't figure out why the woman was yelling at him.

It wasn't until later that it struck me that this same scene is acted out in many marriages on a regular basis. I'm not talking about multi-cultural marriages; I'm talking about marriages in which both the husband and the wife speak English. It may seem strange that there would be a language barrier between two people speaking the same language, but the truth is that men and women approach communication very differently.  I can't count how many times I have seen a wife trying to express something to her husband, but he just doesn't seem to get it. "How can you not understand what I'm saying?" She asks in frustration. "I'm speaking English!"

How can two people, who speak the same language, have so much trouble communicating? The answer lies in the inherent differences between the sexes.  The reality is that women think, feel, and communicate in ways that are unique to their sex.  A great deal of the conflict in a marriage arises from the fact that we assume that the opposite sex is just like us (except for the obvious physical differences).  Actually, there are more differences than similarities; a fact which can be a blessing or a curse, depending upon the couple's ability to understand and embrace those differences.

Over the next few weeks, I will be looking at some of the differences between the sexes and how a better understanding of those differences can help you to alleviate the conflicts that you may be experiencing in your marriage or in the way that you interact with the opposite sex.  I hope that you will join me each week as we explore the mystery of God's creation: Man.